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Monday, February 16, 2009

I hope everyone enjoyed "Black Thanksgiving" this weekend!

To celebrate, we present you with a special TRIO OF FREE

First up:


Ultramagnetic MCs
Smack My Bitch Up : Tuff City : 1989

This 1989 All-Star tribute from Kool Keith and the Ultramagnetic MCs is nothing if not thorough, giving props to everyone from '89s big game, from the assistant coaches to the great, late Kevin Duckworth (RIP)

"Kevin Duckworth, dominating the Earth as the middle man, dominating every little man, back and forth down the low post with the slam, pulverizing the hoop cause he's an all-star."

. . . . . . . . . .

Next Up:


Shaquille O'Neal
Shaq Diesel : Jive : 1993

Not so rare but our fave track from everyones fave All Star peformer, Shaq Daddy! Mike Wilbon aka Father MC just wrote a sweet tribute to big Shaq. We all love Shaq, for his larger than life clowning, his respect for authority, for his bonhomie (its french for "good homie"!). I Hate 2 Brag is Shaq at his boasting best, he's like Ali for the UPN Generation!

I Can Flow Like Pee Coming Out Your Know What
Or Some Dookie Diarrhea Coming Out Ya Butt

Those are the titest baller rimez since C-Webb rhymed "Jerome Bettis" with "Lettuce"!!!!

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And finally....

"WE BE BALLIN' (Street Mix)"

Ice Cube, Shaq and Michael Jackson
12" Single : A&M Records : 1997
Unreleased NBA Campaign

This supa-rare slammin cut was supposed to be released on an NBA Compilation album in 1998 and also be used  in the NBA "I Love This Game" commercials but then the strike happened and Rod STrickland bought a gold hot dog cart and Commissioner STern decided to get serious about the league's "negro problem" and killed it!!!!!!

This song is a real piece of sports history. The late 90s was the peak time for the NBA and NFL bankrolling sham big league "collaborations" drummed up by marketing departments and PR teams and buzz analists. Just throwing these big musical names together with no rime or reason except to mate demographics like they were bonobos or columbia maryland divorcees and not real people. The SUper Bowl is the worst offenderz with their halftime mashup spectaculars of Aerosmith and Run DMC and Britney SPears. Hey viewership down among the old, the sad, and the urban nihilist mimes? Get me the agents for James Taylor and the Insane Clown Possee!!!! But in real life if you throw acts like this into a bright cage u end up compromising them both and pissing off both their fans. I mean I like Ladysmith Black Mombazo and Amy WInehouse as much as the next guy but i dont want to see them harmonizing with Jason Sehorn at media day. U aint gonna cross over the fans that way, you gonna totally kross em out!!!!

But thats no the reason the league killed this marvel. here are the reasons:

Reason One:

Ice CUbe! In 98 Ice CUbe was still angry, and also still black. It was before he was making friendly Disney fart comedies and was the same year he put out a record with songs like "If I Was F*ckin' You", "Cash Over Ass" and "Ghetto Vet". And this was also the time when David Stern was staying up night in his pajamas having first thoughts about making an NBA Dress Code, a dress code that would specifically stamp out "hip hop culture" and Timberlands and the payback lynchings of rich white men.

Reason Two:

Michael Jacksons really creepy chorus, where he deploys a verbal twist and turns "Ballin" from something you do with other dudes into something you force upon them. Ballin as atrocity!

Nothin' You Can Say
'Aint Nothing You Can Do

We Be Ballin' You
We Be Ballin' You

Who hearing this chorus cant help but think of a little child cowering under his bed at Bad Touch Mansion hearing this song coming from the hall and hearing the footsteps and sliding into the sickly sweet swoon of pepsi and wine and knowing the end of innocence is nigh????

And keep in mind that in 98 Mike Jackson was at the heights of his normalcy. Before the trials, before the nose fell off, before the Bahranian Witness protection program. He was still a pop star and Americas most wholesome shemale!!!! Who would have thought in 1998 that 10 years later if u were a mom you would rather your kids spend a weekend with Cube than with Jacko???

But in the 90s Michael Jackson was money in the bank and the NBA kept desperately trying to get him in the mix. They kept insisting he was a typical black kid who had game like in this video where he plays one-on-one against Michael Jordan. Im not sure what gives Jacko away, his slap-happy dribbling or his loafers and athletic Esprit orange poplin blouse? You can tell even in these old photos that Jacko dont be ballin'. Yes sure there is a time each day when there is ballin' at Neverland Ranch. U when that time is? Its when the little little hand touches the big hand!!! Oh snap Annie R U OK smooth criminal!!!!


Michael please tell me about Kevin bacons underpants!


michael jackson

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posted by wizznutzz