August Strindberg aka "The VOLE" was going to be selling his newest graphic novel!
We have been Furries ever since Anthrocon 05 when Dana aka "Cloaca-Mae" was approached by a man in a vintage Winnie The Pooh suit with a sign that said "Touch My Honeypot Christopher Robin" and it turned out to Be fellow mascot enthusiast Jerry Stackhouse!!!
JStack turned us onto the whole scene and some weekends he would pick us up in his Escalade and we just roll , roll away with the wind in our hair... roll away from our uncomfortable bald naked manskins and from bald naked man-prejudice
ANyway so we needed to find housing for Anthrocon07 since Courtyard by Marriot banned furries after last year because of mascot-sized scats in the morning danish cart and that missing south african tourist found in the pouch of "Mike The Wallaby"
SO Jaarko posted on furrie message boards : "GerbilSeeksRacoons!" and a guy called "Foxwolfie" emailed us . He seemed nice enough!!
He promised us space in his den outside pittsburgh!!
But then he started talking to Jaarko about this money-making idea he had. He said he had a real sex tape of "a famous celebrity" and that he would sell it to Jarrko for $400 and that Jaarko could put it on our website and make millions for Pay-Per-View selling so Jaarko says "YOA!!!" and now we are out $400 and stuck with old betamax tape of what turns out to just be video of EVAN Longoria playing Nintendo 64 with his shirt off!!! SO long story short, we are back at Wheaton Plaza, but still in our fur constumery since we already paid for them. Circuit city loves us because The kids love us and because the mice dont!!!
And there was some mail in our box when we got back!
KFERG is genious no doubt. He learned the damn KEYTAR at age 3. He was a keytar protege and the oldest of DR FINK'S 12 sons. DR FINK worked him hard, like earl woods, to give him the keytar opportunities he never had. He went on Carson and played "Stray Cut Strut" on synth at age 4!! Doc Severensen was visibly pleased!!!
AND ALSO, Wizznutzz Northen Indiana Bureau CHIEF ANDREW SENDS US THIS SIGHTING OF the "POWERFUL AND CRAFTY" GOD:
Your faithful correspondent in the basketball backwoods of Elkhart, Ind., (former home of Shawn "Supersperm" Kemp!), Andrew, reporting in on the IBL "World Championship" held here in the friendly confines of North Side Gym Saturday night. The reigning champs, the Elkhart Express, hosted the Portland Chinooks for all the marbles, and eked out a 113-109 win. All was well in Elkhart, the new epicenter of the hoops world.
But one fact escaped me until Sunday evening: The Chinooks were piloted by none other than Shammgod Wells, AKA God Shammgod! God passed out 15 assists in the losing effort, but that's not all he dished out. From The Truth's story for publication Monday:
"After Elkhart had stormed back from a 17-point, third-quarter deficit to draw as close as 74-71 late in the period, the powerful and crafty Wells, a former NBA player and Providence College star, drove the lane on consecutive possessions, got fouled both times and hit all four free throws to restore the Chinooks' lead to 78-71.
With most in the crowd of 3,244 booing lustily, Wells shook his head and waved mockingly to the fans to turn up the volume as he stepped to the line, then held his hand to his ear halfway through each set of free throws as if to say, "I can't hear you."
That only riled up the fans more.
And their developing dislike for Wells may have been at least a little bit of what kept those fans fired up after Portland stretched its lead back out to 99-87 with just 7:23 remaining in the game.
Sweet irony how it all worked out.
After Elkhart took its first lead since the first quarter at 107-105, Wells had a chance to even the score with another pair of free throws.
He missed the first, the crowd squealed and laughed and roared in response, and the Chinooks never did catch the Express the rest of the way.
"He started it, and I'm glad he did," Elkhart guard Coleco Buie said after the game.
"It doesn't take much with our crowd," Express coach and owner Daimon Beathea said of Wells' third-quarter gestures, "but, yeah, I was glad to see it."
Certainly Cedric Moodie noticed, and Elkhart's season scoring leader didn't approve.
"Oh, yeah, I remember it," Moodie said of Wells' maneuvers. "I give them a lot of credit for being a good team, but I think they were kind of disrespecting us, too. They were kind of arrogant, and we didn't take that too well. We had to do what we had to do."
Teammate Correy Childs was a little more amused than Moodie, but ultimately, he thought Wells' ridicule played into the game as well.
"That's a typical New York guard," Childs said with a chuckle of the New York City native. "They like that type of stuff, but as a basketball player, you've just got to use it as motivation to work harder to stop him. He had a good game, but we did a pretty good job on him."
Moodie, Tim Pledger, Rashi Johnson and Darmetreis Kilgore were among those who had turns at guarding Wells, who dominated during the first half, but was slowed considerably in the second.
Wells netted 14 points to go with 6-of-7 shooting from the field and 12 assists before intermission as Portland took a 60-45 lead, but added just seven points, 1-of-7 field-goal shooting and three assists after the break."
I thought you might be interested in hearing of Shamm's voyage to north-central Indiana. I also attached a photo of the veteran guard for your enjoyment.
Damn, Elkharrt fans are harsh! They boo god!
But This story is obviously faker than Jim Lynams tax return!
For one, we all know that when God isnt in the Chitown McDOnalds, that hes busy recording posthumus Tupac records. Second of all the names are obviously fake!
"Rashi Johnson"?? Only place u gonna find that name is on Danas caller ID! !!!
And "Moodie", "Tim Pledger", and "Darmetreis Kilgore"???
Those are all Harry Potter characters, not IBL playas!!!