All summer long we will be checking in with Wizards and Wizznutzz playas to update you on their offseason motionz!
OFFSEASON PROFILE #1
Our senior intern Darvin was planning to spend this summer forming a Wheaton chapter of THE ORDER OF THE GILBERTINE but instead he has rushed to Sagninaw to be by his mother's side in her time of need. As we reported before HERE and HERE former Saginaw Mayor Wilmer Jones-Ham has been charged with fraud and arson and now she has a court date!!!
She has been released on 'Personal Recognisance Bond' awaiting trial and has had GPS implanted in her wig to stop her jumping the next coal car to the Ham family compound in Nutbush!
Darvin told us all week he isn't worried and that he thinks he has found The Real Perpetrator but Darvin must secretly have more fears than he lets out judging on this cry for help he posted recently on RONNIE MERVIS' advice blog !!!!!!!
You all know Ronnie Mervis!! He is tha KING OF BLING and one of DCs famous "diamond brothers". He runs the business and hangs with cashed up local rollers like CLinton Portis while his brother Zed watches over the African mines and raises prize winning German Shepherds! Zed hopes to join Ronnie in the US once US Customs and United Nations soon lifts its sanctions on him that were imposed for a misunderstanding involving a 1998 cargo of 'West Indian Gherkin' that 'escaped' off the coast of Trinidad!
Our hearts and prayers r with Davrin but we know if anyone can help us it is Ronnie Mervis!!
Labels: Ham, offseason, Video