The HMS SWAG is taking on water faster than Kevin Duckworth's ankles! The boat is going to Davey Jones locker, which is just like Calvin Booths locker but with with no James Blunt poster and less crustaceans!
Wizznutzz are going down with the ship, playing Ballad of Manute Bol all tha way on our Didgeredoos. (Hey Why is my didgeredoo hairy???)
Agent Zero backlash in full effect! Quirky is out! Antawn can cure cancer! Gilbert vows to score 50 on his mouth! Wash Times announces Bambi DVD burning party!
HEY HATERS, hey what u want Tracey Murray back now???? Sure TMurray once guaranteed 9 and scored 50. and used to sleep in a Low-altitude tent (he had the stamina of an old Bangladeshi Madam!) but hes not coming back, he loves his job selling coronas on brighton beach. In Russian they have 10 words for 'Respect!'
Juan Dixon [this incite has been edited after complaint that wizznutzz made fun of JDixons parents who died of aids. R U CRAZY!!!??? We dont make japes bout dead Moms. We only make JDiz immune jokez cuz he dont like germz and carries his own toilet paper roll in the lockeroom. INCREASE THE PEACE!!! ] thrashed the Wiz and suddenyl the media is saying the seasons lost. As long as Andres "Dirty Bomb" Nocioni gets clocked in the nuts in round one, its a good season. Ive havnt seen such biting of the hand that feeds since Rod Strickland stole the tip jar from a humble Farragut North frank vender!
Today Wizards hold first players-only meeting, where Darius SOnglia explained to teammates how babies are made!!
-No Snub Left behind -FInally finish new Subway line for DOgs -COnfirm Tubbs as Minister for Homeland Security -Distribute "Peoples Hibachis" to every citizen -Collect ties of all world leaders -Pardon Gar Heard
Expect official MoHut campaign swag in the coming days!
WSJ bashes Salieri, gives shoutout to Wizznutzz, and blames Jared Jeffires for depleting global fishering stocks! Next day inspired traders trigger massive short sell of pork bellies!!!
Then TIME MAGAZINE has an Agent Zero feature! Time Mag is slower to the party than a girl in Ugg Boots at a Bel Biv Devoe reunion show! Beware TIME are a bigger trend killer than Tim Allen doing the cabbage patch!
And last after wizznutzz revealed secret war o9f words between Swiney Todd and Thomas the Tank Engine, we present special new reader HAIKUS!!!! From Steve F:
standing at the line brick after brick after brick Calbert hurts the rim
and best ever haiku:
blue and red lights flash CWebb disses the po-po hello, pepper spray
and then from wizznutzz own comment board Adam writes:
