Friday, October 20, 2006
SOmehting smells at Basketball Jones and its smells like Pultitzer!
BBJ tracked down former DC baller Tryone Nesby aka T-Nes or as they call him in eastern europe T-Ne. So Wizznutzz roused intern Strindberg from his fetid bench at Radmansgatan subway station and dispatched him for follow up scoops. This is what we found out:
2 years ago Lithuania traded 300 metric tons of milled grain to US Government in exchange for Tyrone Nesby. The US burned the grain so it wont affect farm subsidies but Lithuania didnt burn TNe, instead he became cultural ambassador aka he blew up so big, hes now Lithuianian Puff Daddy!!! Hes also Lithuanian MLK and Lithuanian Wesley Snipes and Lithuanian you name any black man because T-Ne has somewthing all those young white lithuanian hip-hop wannabes, (they callz em "Litters") dont got - hes got melanin and hes got Michael Jordan's bootprints still on his back!!!!
Now if you check from T-Ne's website, you see him relaxing in the Dnepr-Bug drainage basin aka Darius Songalia Memorial BLVD like he owns the damn place! and thats cuz he just about does because since T-Ne has backing of powerful Lithuanian Mafia Seimos Lygino Asilasaka The Family of The Iron DOnkey and he is now like Vilinius' Most Notorious, and he rolls through town with 24" spinners on his Yugo, kicks it in his delux 300 sqft, 7 bedroom loft with its vaulted 6' ceilings and tru cement floors, hes wearing top luxury goat skin trenchcoats with London Fog labels sewn inside, and he wont think not 2 seconds about dropping 4, even 5 euros, on VIP tab for fermented milk bottle service. ANd of course T-Ne always has the finest, flyest, Lithuanian Cheerleadres on his arm.
And btw Lithuanian cheerleaders R way more than just a pretty edutainer. U think you can just give any girl a pair of reebok pumps, some hair removal aid, and an ankle-length rally cape and she becomes a Lithuanian Cheerlerader?? Hell in a hoop no! Cuz in Lithuania, cheerleaders are like Geishas, and it is their art to pleasure a man and they are trained by tradition on farms and slected for their prized milking skillz.