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Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Intern August Strindberg reporting...

So a few weeks ago Dr Chestnutt from the Kingdom of green Lies known as CELTICS DOOM threw down a Gilbert vs Pierce challenge to intern August Strindberg:

Zero vs. The Truth. The empty actuality of Being vs. Infinite Change. Put Strindberg on it Wizznutzz, I'll see if Celticsdoom can dig up Heidegger. Investigation #1 - what are the existential ramifications of The Void of Pure Nothingness telling The Principles of Reality to go fuck itself? Is bacon the fundamental component of all matter?

A fair question.

Well this week a ragged looking crow flew through my window, pecked a piece of old egg out of my girlfriends beard, and dropped a torn scroll that contained AUgusts reply:

A lesser man than I -- nay, a lesser writer, for there are none but, and a godlier man, for there are none but -- would perhaps attempt an epigram along the lines of "Paul Pierced the Wiz-Ards."

This would be regrettable, but then, what isn't?

The Blog of the pasty Celts hath called me out, and a response is in order.

But what response can there be to a prayer chucked up by the boy with the thorn in his side? Still bearing the stigmata scars of his youthful nightclubbery, the headbanded disciple Paul was blessed, no doubt. But what good is the favor of the gentle Christ when confronted with Thor's hammer, Loki's trickery, or Freya's terrifying womanly void? Tis a game of gods, and no shamgod (nor scalabrine) shall sniff this playoffs this spring.

Now anyone knows August he likes 3 things:

-watching michael adams dive for balls
-vomiting in his seat behind the visitors bench
-downing pints of absinthe n' Tab while holding court at This Mortal Coil in Wheaton Plaza (dont go looking for it, its hidden for good reason) telling anyone who will listen his feelings on Truth and Nothingness. He has told me many times:

1. The world is without truth, ergo paul pierce is without skillz.

2. Gilbert represents man's Will to Nothingness, and from this nothingness (the Universal Snub) he finds meaning.

3. God is dead. Despite reports that he lead the Saudi League in three-pointers last season.

4. The Strindberg Paradox clearly states: "If all bacon is crispy... oh damn damn damned whore of a life!"

On the flipside of his scroll, August attached a sketch for a Wizz Throwback Jersey.

Does Mitchell and Ness have a line in Victorian wool CLoaks??

Note the authentic pre-staining and fine seamery on the absynthe pouch!!!!


posted by wizznutzz