Monday, February 20, 2006
What in the name of God Shammgod is the NBA trying to do? HAND THE WIZARDS THE TITLE? MORE GILBERT SNUBS!!!!
In the allstar game Our Gil played a game-low 9 minutes, going 0-6 from the field and scoring one point. Insultation!!!! Why not just pull down his pants and make him play in a game-stained Jahidi thong? Why not shave his head, paint "FLAMING FAGGOT" on his dome, and write "KWAME BROWN" on the back of his jersey? Why not make him duct-tape his penis between his legs and call him "REBECCA LOBO"?
Minnesota better wear bullet-proof vests and titanium cups because Gilbert is gonna go Gil Sr. on their Timberasses. See, Gilbert not only has motivation to kill everyone in league now, he's also given himself the nickname of "Mr. President" meaning he has the total authority to wipe out entire countries if he so chooses. "I'm Mr. President," Arenas said to WaPo. "They tried to impeach me, but they couldn't. I'm here."
Then he got a blow job under the towel rack and blew up Iran!!!!
Gilbert finds any way he can to be motivated, from comparing himself to Bill Clinton to bringing up the fact that he was 31st overall draftchoice in 2001 to the fact that his pre-game chicken fingers are always served cold at the MCI Center. Abe POllin, you foxy bastard, don't spring for a microwave!!! Cold poultry is a dish best served cold, like revenge and Black Thxgiving Muleheads!!!
Marc Stein broke some wind about GIlbert at the allstar game, calling him the "Best interview" and "Best Kisser" out of all the guys gathered on Friday's media day. From Stein Line Dime about Our Gil: "He also revealed he brought jerseys of all last season's All-Stars and had slowly been getting them signed throughout the season, finishing the last one just this week." Gilbert's taking his elementary-school snub to logical conclusion: learning how to write and becoming a master forger!!!
Meanwhile, Charles Barkley, the Round Mound of Bubblebutts, said, “When you play for the Wizards, [Gilbert Arenas] is like Michael Jackson… he’s playin’ with a lot of Tito Jacksons.”
More motivation! Gilbert will now play the role of JOE JACKSON and insist on getting Andre "Randy" Blatche, Party Jon "Jermaine" Ramos, and Calvin "Marlon" Boothe more shots while delivering severe beatdowns right in their smart-talking mouths. VICTORY TOUR!!!
posted by wizznutzz OUR FAMOUS MOTHERING HUT T-SHIRTS PERMALINK |
