great to have the womans touch back on wizznutzz, even if that womans touch must be kept away from open wounds at all costs.
Man this is the Best Black thanksgiving EVER!!!
Charles Barkley looks like a Black Brando in Burberry!
August Strindberg is in the field , compiling exhaustive reviews of Houston area strip clubs. He hasnt enjoyed the assignment much tho because he complains that "the whores insist on disturbing my dark quarantine" and that more than one cabaret had strict no-overcoat policies!!
Did you see Gilbert shooting lites out last nite??? I havent seen such a display since Tim Legler was in the the 3 point shoot out. But it was Leggz 1st all star appearance and the other players convinced him that when you shoot the "Money Ball" the shorts come off so it was a different kind of display. But more about Leggz later.
Michael Wilbon has been been perfomring all the duties expected as Honorary mayor of Black Thanksgiving. He's been seen all over town, shuckin and jivin, hugging and hi fiving.
Dana send in this video she captured on her cell phone from the Matilda Bay Wine Cooler / Qyntel Woods VIP Dogs Breakfast Afterparty. Its a bit blurry but not too blurry to clearly see Michael SALIERI Jordan riding up behind a bent-over Michael Wilbon doing some kind of Brokeback disco breakdown
To make sure his plate would be as black and clear as his pate, WIlbon obviously pre-wrote all his weekend columns.
His first column was a generic "whats eating gilbert arenas" profile that weve read a hundred times but of course anytime gilbert speaks, people listen and there was some tite quotes from the chocolate chook.
It shows us
the 3 Stages in the Tao Of Gilbert as they Mirror the universal Song-Cycle of the band KANSAS:
STAGE 1: Existential Humility In which gilbert acknowledges the contingency of the universe and the futility of ambition:
"I don't let the NBA life get to me. It's a breeze and we're just blowing through it. In another 10 years there will be another crop of players blowing through."
Its just like the Kansas song, 'Dust In The WInd':
I close my eyes, only for a moment, and the moment's gone All my dreams, pass before my eyes, a curiosity Dust in the wind, all they are is dust in the wind. STAGE 2: Social Exceptionalism In which Gilbert imagines himself as part of the larger heroism of humanity
"But at the end of this weekend, I've got 13 other guys who I'm in the foxhole with and we're still trying to find a way to make the playoffs and contend."
Its just like the Kansas song 'Black Fathom 4', a song that Steve Blake has tatooed on his lower back:
Quick money give me double trouble Friends are doing hard times in the hole
STAGE 3: THE POWER OF THE WILL In which Gilbert advances a Post-Kantian ethic that man only exists in so much as man strives.
"I just won't put myself on that list," he said, "because it gives me a reason to keep climbing. I don't believe in satisfaction. I have to think there are 10, 15 people ahead of me. It's like setting your watch 10 minutes ahead. You come to believe the time on your watch."
This is the most important step in the Gilbert cycle, and no one says it better than Kansas , in their masterpiece 'Play On':
Play on, play on, lifting our voices to reach the sky Play on, play on, sound a refrain to be heard on high Play on, play on, singing a song and my heart's on fire
Play the game tionight Play, play the game tonight Can you tell me if it's wrong or right It is worth the time, is it worth the price Do you see yourself in a white spotlight Then play the game tonight
PLAY ON GILBERT! Kansas and Arenas: Tru Wariors! Play On brothers!
Its much more uplifting than the single-song cycle that currently describes Wes Unselds home life:
"Miracles Out of Nowhere" by Kansas:
Hey there Mister Madman, wat'cha know that I don't know Tell me some crazy stories, let me know who runs this show Glassy-eyed and laughing, he turns and walks away Tell me what made you that way
*******
And then in WILBONS second column, Wilbon invokes the true spirit of Black Thanksgiving, counting his blessings and saying a prayer for those less fortunate, thjose like...
RYAN LEGLER!!! Thats right we live in as world where the white man is endangered! Whites are being discouraged from playing basketball and there threatens to be a whole land of invisible children, there hopes dashed, forced to be swallowed by the thankless careers that their parents stuggled with for a generation before them as Lawyers, Fund managers, movie stars, Politicians, doctors, astronauts, nobel prize winning physicists. WHAT A WASTE!
Wizznutzsz propose we start a special charity program called:
"RYANS SONG"(tm)
The program will raise awareness for the plight of middle-upper class white children in america.
It will demand the government invest more of americas money to strenghtneing the athletic departments of prestigous private schools.
Tim Legler and Kansas will sing a benefit concert, and tim will start crying when he sings the refreain to 'One Man, One Heart":
One man, one heart Standing in the flame Can you hear my voice tonight I'm calling out - I'm calling out your name Ryan. Ryan Legler...
We have to do it because the children are the future, the white future! Without hope Ryan Legler will be but a white shadow of his father. he will be forced to go to a good college, have sex with the daughters of prominent businiessmen, get a graduate degree, travel the globe, learn languages, develop real world skills, start a lucrative business, have conversations with other men that arent only about the Spurs interior defense. He will have no iother choice but to develop a strong imagination, a robust mind, a mind into which he can escape when his hobbling orange father limps into the room to tell him once again about the time in 1995 he scored 12 points in a 90-82 loss to the Detroit Pistons.
posted by wizznutzz OUR FAMOUS MOTHERING HUT T-SHIRTS PERMALINK |
