Saturday, February 18, 2006
Black Thxgivin' !!! Black Black It don't stop!! And neither do these rashes!! Heyyyy evrrrry body it's DANA VON POSTGAME CALL-IN SHOW GIRL!!! Fresh out of rehab and a minimum state security prison for the continually itchy!!! Its been a weird time for me because i got busted using Rod Strikland's debit card at a Bowie gas station. I was trying to buy some Virginia Slims, some Lays and some lays. But who knew that prostitution was illegal in gas station? I mean, WHATS A LUBE JOB ANYWAY??? Hypeocritics!@!! Buyt now that I'm out and turned part lesbian -- four months of hard labor under a sexy woman named Big Reg is enuff to turn anybody into a girl toucher -- i'm ready to focus my life and post more INCXITES into Wizards!!!
I start with the AWESOME news that FIVE Wizards have been named to All-star team!!! Rip Hamilktohn, Gilbert Arenas, Rasheed Wallace and Benjainmen Wallace and Chauncy Billups!!!! Thses five player s have given the Wizrads the #1 TEam in All Of Basketball!!! Just about the only team that is better is the Talk 'n' Text Phone Pals of the Philipines Basketball Association, which recently imported our VERY OWN DARVIN HAM for a game in their championship series!!! Here's what the newspaper said of Darvn debut:
But back to our Wizards all stars, here's a picture that Abe Poillin took just before he smashed their faces into congratualations cake and then twirled his diaper over head in celebration!! But wait, where's Gilbert? Still fuming over snub, Gilbert is planning revenge on foes throuhgout league for rest of the season!! Gilbert gets revenge fanaastys from his father, who wiped out a whole crew of drug-dealing nuns in the second episode of Miami Vice. "Say hello to my little friend" yelled Gil Sr. even though the line was "Hands up, gents, nobody needs to get hurt," and the director LOVED the fact that Gil Sr. gunned down everyone -- nun hoodies flying everywhere!!! -- while quoting Scarface. Sure, now it's a rapper's cliche, but in 1984 that was straight up gangsta improv shit!!!
Meanwhile, Gilbert is fuming over another snub: No, not Jahidi's invitation to the Steve Blake All Sauna Finals that Hidi is holding in his Oxen Hill home, but rather that he WAS'NT INVITED TO 3 POINT CHALLENGE but then was ADDED TO 3 POINT CHALLEGE when Raja Bell left!!! Can't somebody give Gilbert an arenas an invite the FIRST time around so he doesn't have to feel like a blackheaded stepchild? Can I get a whatwhat?????
Then to add insult to injury, when Gilbert gets to AllStar game, a David Stern broke out disposable Kodak, snaps this candid, and turns it over to a Photoshop artist who turns Gilbert into a DOUGHY OLD WHITE MAN!!! Will the insulats and snubs ever cease???
MORE SOME PHOTOS!!!
Brendan Haywood & Jared "I Am Curious Oranj George" Jefferies show their allstar attention to team huddle!!!
Jah Jah Rasta Sheed I !!! Marcus Garvey decorates Sheed's chest. Sheed decorates WHITE MEDIA with BLACK POWER STARE!!!
Pharoah Sanders Hamilton poses in front of the Sun Ra where he came from. Is Rip trying to get off Wizards team by showing love for the Cavaliers new MILITANT BLACK look? (Thanks to Ris Paul Ric for pointing out that half the Cavs are growing Malcom X goattees and the other half are growing sixth fingers in case Cold Mountain breaks another!!!)
Here's OUR KID Gilbert looking fine, a MAN IN TAN covering the HEART OF AN ASSASSIN!!! Knock em dead Gilbert!!! CALL ME!!!
